The Wild World of Feelings

It’s been a couple of weeks since the election and so many people I have talked to are experiencing waves of feelings moving through them. They range all the way from exhilaration to devastation.

If your party lost, you may be feeling devastation, fear for the future, and heartache for our planet. If your party won, you may be feeling righteousness, my way is better than yours, and the joy of feeling you are in control.

Both of those extremes are just part of the clouds in our mind that keep us cut off from the peace and joy we truly are. As Rumi said, “Beyond right-doing and wrong-doing there is a field. I will meet you there.” In other words, we are so much more than the feelings that pass through us, feelings that move back in forth between being open and closed, judgmental and compassionate, and mad and glad. He is pointing to the truth that right outside of the “right-doing and wrong-doing” of our minds is the field of peace and joy that we truly are. That may be hard to hear right now but stay with me.

There is nothing wrong with feelings. They are an integral part of being human. The difficulty lies in the belief that they are who we are and when we identify with them, they capture our attention and take us on a wild ride. I can still remember the first time fear flooded me and rather than falling into it or trying to get away, I simply bore witness to it and it passed right on through. I felt indescribable joy as I had been run by fear my whole life.

To help us open to the truth that we are much more than our feelings, a great metaphor is the sun. No matter how cloudy it is and no matter if it is the dark of the night, the sun is always there. No matter how caught you are in the clouds of feelings that move through you all day long, the deep peace you truly are, is always, always here.

When you let that truth in, your mind may say, “I want that. What do I need to do to get there?” But trying to get to the deep peace we long for never works because you are already and always there. And trying only creates more clouds.

When you realize the field of ease and peace you long for is with you now, you begin to become fascinated by the clouds in your mind that veil your connection with this field. And every time you meet your feelings with compassionate attention, they pass through you more quickly and the sun of your essence is easier to connect with.

So, for me, and hopefully for you, the election can be an invitation to see the clouds in your mind rather than identifying with them. To have moments where you relate to the feelings that are moving through you, rather than from them, are moments of freedom.

Having been someone where fear, shame, and helpless hopeless despair were mostly what I experienced as I was growing up but to now be in a place where most of the time I live from the spaciousness of my heart, I can tell you it’s possible. Someone told me that this election’s chaos has made them feel like a child again when their new stepparent took over their home. For them, the election is life asking them to meet those feelings. So, how did I find that field of peace? Not by trying to fix my feelings, or get rid of them, or rise above them or even understand them (although that helped a bit in the beginning).

It is by witnessing them and meeting them with your heart. Feelings are just like you and me. When somebody really hears us, we soften and let go. When you say hello to your feelings rather than falling into them or pushing them away, they are able to pass through you like the clouds pass through the sky.

Of course, the clouds in my mind still show up. No sky will ever be clear all the time, nor should they be. Life can be a very fierce and challenging process. But no matter how deeply challenged I am, when I can give whatever I am feeling my loving attention, I am no longer at the mercy of it.

Is this easy? No. We have been identifying with our feelings for most of the time humanity has been around. It is how most of us are taught. But relating to those feelings rather than from them allows us to see clearly the blue sky that we really are. What does relating to look like? Instead of saying, “I am afraid.” You say, “Fear is here.” Or “I see you fear.” Rather than getting lost in the belief that you are right and others are wrong, you say, “I see my mind falling into the idea of ‘them and us’.

At first, identifying your feeling externally might feel awkward and it may not seem all that powerful. But it is. Once it becomes habit, those kinds of moments where you are relating to rather than from your feelings, begin to clear the clouds that block the sun of the field of peace that is always here.

So, I invite you to be kind to yourself right now. This is a very challenging time that is going to bring up all sorts of feelings. Let yourself know it is okay to be human.

I also invite you to have moments where you ask, “What am I experiencing right now?” Or “What is showing up inside of me.”  Then name what you are experiencing whether it is fear, anxiety, rage, helplessness, righteousness, etc.. Just a moment of naming your experience rather than falling into it or trying to get away from it is a moment of freedom. And if you can’t recognize what you are experiencing, just name it struggle.

Be patient with yourself. Life has thrown all of us quite the challenge. As you meet the feelings, thoughts, and experiences coming up for you, slowly the clouds that keep you feeling stuck in fear and heartache will clear and you will be able to see the path forward to what you really long for; An intimate, alive, trusting connection with yourself and life itself.

If this post resonated with you and want to explore more of my work, I invite you to listen to my upcoming radio show on Dreamvisions 7 Radio: The Phenomenal Healing Power of Trust, It will air on Thursday, November 21st at 5am and 5pm HERE. After the 21th, it will be available on demand, along with every other radio show I’ve ever done HERE. Please feel free to explore my catalog and listen to topics that call to you.

Offerings:

You are invited to join us for the next Free Live Call: Does Pain have to be so Painful? It’s coming up fast, we will be meeting Tuesday, December 3rd at 5:30 pm PST for an hour and a half. We will continue to meet every two months, so keep an eye out for future events!

We all experience pain.  And we all experience all levels of pain – physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual.

But we are living in an exciting time where we are changing our relationship to pain. Join Mary in exploring how, rather than resisting the pains in your life, you can befriend them so that you receive the gifts that always come with them.

Don’t forget if you can’t make it on the day, you can still participate by sending your questions and enjoying the recording after the call at your convenience. I hope to see you there!

Click HERE to learn more and register!