Healing Your Deepest Hurts Part 1B

I have a startling truth to share with you…… all of us are wounded! This is true even for those people who look like they have it all together, like social media influencers and people in the entertainment world.

The core of this wounding happened in the first six years of our lives, when most of us were raised by what I call unconscious giants who had also been wounded. They may have loved us, but most parents didn’t know how to be truly present for their children, so they abandoned and invaded us in ways they oftentimes didn’t even notice. And in many families, abuse was rampant. In order to belong to the family, which was absolutely essential for our survival, we had to stuff our wounds deep inside, where, for most people, they influence their daily experience until the day they die.

As we grew up, we all got caught in our heads, trying to do life right rather than be open to the flow of life, because we believed we needed to be different from who we were to be okay. A study showed this movement from being life to doing life. They studied the breathing patterns of little children. All of them, before they went to preschool, breathed their natural breath, the kind of breath that dogs and cats breathe, which fills their whole body. By the time they were six, not one child was breathing this way!! They all had learned to hold their breath and tighten their bodies, trying to be what they thought they should be, because it was no longer safe to be themselves.

When we were little —and yes, at one time you were less than two feet tall —we needed to be loved as we were, rather than the message most of us got that we needed to be different. We needed patience, kindness, a sense of belonging, and a feeling of safety. And we needed at least one person who would listen, really listen to us, accepting us exactly as we were.

Because most of us only had these needs partially met, or not met at all, we all carry the wounds of being unseen, unheard, judged, feeling like outsiders, not being enough, thinking we are failures, that nobody loves us, and that we’re all alone.

So, we created a storyteller in our heads that constantly monitored how we were doing, often judging us unmercifully. Most of us don’t know how to unhook from our storyteller’s version of life and don’t know how to set the wounds free that fuel its constant flow, so we spend an enormous amount of our energy trying to hide our wounds from ourselves and others.

After working with people for over 40 years, I can tell you that everyone’s thoughts struggle with life, and everyone tries to relieve themselves of this suffering by staying as far away from their pain as they can, which doesn’t heal anything.

What an exhausting way to live, half alive! To set these wounds free would open us up to the peace, joy, trust, and love we so deeply long for.

How can we heal these deep pains that all of us carry? What I offer isn’t about fixing anything, understanding anything, or dredging up memories from your childhood. It is about discovering the phenomenal power of focused, accepting attention.

Everything I have shared with the world in my books, my podcast, and my online courses are all designed to help you discover how to see and set free your mind’s addiction to struggle so you can again be present for your life. If this calls to you, you can listen to my podcast with the same name as this blog: Click Here. Or open one of my books randomly every day or listen to the dozens of previous podcasts that are available on demand, at any time of the day. Click Here

This is all about learning a new language, the language of the aware heart. When learning a new language, we need to practice. So, listen to or read something every day that reminds you that who you are is the one who sees your struggling mind rather than believing its stories.

Offerings:

Healing Holiday Sale: All Self-paced courses only $49

Every time I see the news, my heart aches for the pain inflicted on the world by an old kind of mind that doesn’t recognize the sacredness of every particle, of every being. But I also see more and more people awakening to a way of being with life that cares not only for all people but also for the Earth itself.

You are reading this newsletter because you are a part of this awakening. For the holidays, I am offering all my online, self-paced courses for $49. I recognize the restorative messages within them and wish for them to reach more people so they can contribute to the healing of our world. Please consider sharing them with your loved ones as well.

What’s in Your Way IS the Way will show you how to unhook from your mind’s addiction to struggle so you can know the joy of being fully present for life.

Falling In Love with You is all about how to fall in love with you exactly as you are, so you can rest in the compassion, kindness, and empathy that is who you really are.

Being Healed by Our Compulsions changes your relationship to your compulsions from enemy to ally, allowing them to guide you out of the world of struggle and back into the ease and peace that is your birthright.