Be Your Own Beloved
I am inviting you into a most radical thing – to become your own beloved. We search for love ‘out there’ because we have put ourselves out of our own hearts. There is so much about ourselves that we have rejected, so we hope to find somebody who will love us unconditionally because we can’t give that to ourselves. This barricade around our hearts causes us to have very little mercy for ourselves and others. It’s such a painful way to live.
Because we are ashamed and afraid of so many parts of ourselves, we bury these qualities deep inside, hoping we won’t notice them and nobody else will either. It’s like trying to hold a bathtub of rubber duckies under the water. No matter how hard you try to keep those qualities hidden deep inside, they pop up, often when we most don’t want them too. This causes us to be imprisoned in resistance, not available to life.
How would your life change if you made room in your heart for every single part of you?
What would happen if you understood that to become whole means meeting everything about yourself with kindness and understanding?
What would happen if, when loneliness came, you didn’t fall into it? Instead, you breathed into it, touching it with tenderness.
What would happen if, rather than being afraid of your fear, you said “hello” to it?
What would happen if you weren’t judgmental about how much your mind judges yourself and others?
What would happen if you weren’t ashamed of how much self-interest and self-pity at times move through your mind?
What would happen if, when anger, irritation, and even aggressiveness show up, rather than being lost in them, you touched them with kindness?
What would it be like to enfold sadness with caring rather than being pulled into its world?
What would happen if, rather than closing your heart when envy or jealousy show up, you touched them with compassion?
What would happen if you recognized that your mind is at times competitive? Maybe not as much as some, and maybe less than others, but it’s there inside of you as it is with all people.
What would happen if you saw the compulsive nature of your mind – whether it’s around busyness, sex, food, alcohol, drugs or struggle itself – and rather than going to war with it, you met it with your aware heart?
What would happen if you understood that it is okay for doubt, or confusion, or dread, or greed, or anxiousness, or even revenge to show up? The more you allow them to be here, not giving them power by falling into them or resisting, the less they control you. Or as a friend once said, “Acceptance is magic!”
How freeing it would be to see that your mind dabbles in all these feelings, along with many others, just as everyone else’s does. But because you are mostly afraid to acknowledge this, these feelings run you from underneath your everyday awareness.
It is time to come out of hiding. There is nothing about these qualities in your mind that you need to be ashamed of or afraid of. You may deem them unacceptable and even forbidden, but they are just how the unconscious human mind operates, and everybody experiences them. Healing is not about getting rid of them and arriving at an imaginary ‘all together’ place. It’s about discovering how not to struggle with them so you can bring them home to your heart.
Are you willing to come out of hiding? Are you willing to make room in your heart for every single part of you? When there is nothing you need to keep hidden anymore, your attention is then fully free to be here for life. If you are in a relationship, this willingness to meet yourself as you are with kindness and compassion will make it much easier to meet your partner in the same way. And if you are longing for a relationship, developing a healthy relationship with yourself will make it more possible to have a healthy relationship with someone else.
I invite you to be your own beloved and become a part of the healing force that our beleaguered planet so desperately needs in this time of chaos and change.
If this blog resonated with you and want to explore more of my work, I invite you to listen to my upcoming radio show on Dreamvisions 7 Radio: The First Key to a Joyful Life, It will air on Thursday, October 3rd and 10th at 5am and 5pm HERE. After the 10th, it will be available on demand, along with every other radio show I’ve ever done HERE. Please feel free to explore my catalog and listen to topics that call to you.
Offerings:
ONLY A WEEK AWAY: You’re invited to join us for The Phenomenal Healing Power of Trust which will take place on Tuesday, October 8th at 5:30pm PDT for an hour and a half, as usual. Here’s a little more detail in what we will be discussing:
It seems like so much is out of our control right now – angry, berating politics, climate change, and seemingly endless wars. Can we trust it all? Join Mary in exploring what true trust is, how to bring it into your life, and the gifts that will bring.
Don’t forget if you can’t make it on the day, you can still participate by sending your questions in advance and enjoying the recording after the call at your convenience. I hope to see you there!
Click HERE to learn more and register!
This piece today about coming home/bringing home all parts of ourselves by welcoming and loving these parts is perfect for me. I awoke very early unable to fall back asleep. After some time wrestling with myself and with a sad troubled mood I spontaneously started saying ‘I love you’ to the sorrow, confusion, longing, frustration, etc and began to realize that really loving all of myself is a choice. Again, this is perfect timing! Thank you Mary!♥️
Thank you so much for sharing that experience! Life really does have a way of teaching us if were able to listen. It’s wonderful you were able to meet yourself in that way. It really can make all the difference. I wish you all the best on your journey. Be light!