How to Heal Divisiveness

It is now almost a week after the election in the US and many people are still caught in divisiveness. This kind of mind thinks that ‘my’ viewpoint is right and yours is wrong. When we are aligned with this kind of mind, we oftentimes call other people names, talk about them behind their back, make fun of them, riot and destroy property, and we may even shoot somebody because they don’t see things the ‘right way’.

How can we heal this divisiveness, which is not only in the US but is spreading like a virus all over the world? It is healed through kindness and its power is nestled at the heart of every religion. Through kindness you can become a part of the healing that is possible at this time.  In order to live a life of kindness, it is helpful to understand that we are all in this together for we are accustomed to seeing everything outside of us as other—separate and disconnected from us.

One of the most skillful ways to cut through the illusion of ‘other’ is to act as if everything were a part of us—for it truly is.  Science has now shown that life is an interconnected web with everything, dependent on everything else for its survival.  You need the rain, the bees, the sun and the people who harvest your food in order to survive. (And the people who drive your food to market, the people who make the roads, the people who make the trucks, the people who drill the oil, the people who stock the grocery stores and on and on.)

If you take just a few moments, you will also see that there is so much more we have in common than we have in differences. Your skin color, your religious beliefs, your political inclinations, your sexual preference, and possibly even your whole view of life may be different than mine, but we share the same air, water and planet. At the root of our existence we also carry the same fears and desires, the same confusions and hopes, whether we live in a tribal village in Africa or a high rise in Manhattan.

Think of a newborn child. We were all a baby at one time and we were all born in innocence, with the urge to love and be loved at the core of our being…..even Hitler and terrorists.  As the cauldron of daily life molds and shapes us, differences become more apparent, but still nestled in the heart of every being is a basic goodness and the desire to be happy.

Your heart truly begins to respond when it also realizes that pain and sorrow exist in absolutely everyone’s life.  There is a story about a woman who lost her young son, her only child.  When she approached the Buddha, overcome with grief, she said, “Master, please bring my boy back to life.”  The Buddha replied, “I will, but first you must go into the village and get me a handful of mustard seeds from a home where no one has lost a loved one to death.”  She went from house to house, searching for the seeds.  But when she asked if anyone in the home had died, the answer was always “yes.”  Finally, she realized that what had happened to her happens to everyone—that all who are born will also die and all people experience loss.

Your heart can open when it realizes that death happens to each of us, and also upset, loss, heartache, craving, grief, anger, judgment, confusion and despair, and that each of us is doing the best we know how with the challenges life has given us. Understanding this, you can respond to all who you see with kindness.

Connecting with kindness as you hand your money to the clerk or smile at the other person in the elevator or listen to someone’s problems with compassion makes a difference in your life and in the life of every person you meet.  Little acts of kindness accumulate and one day more and more of us will grow into the truth that we’re all in this together, living on a tiny blue green white jewel of a planet, which is floating through vast oceans of space.  And then, the only sane approach to life is kindness.

I leave you with a wonderful quote from author and philosopher Aldous Huxley:

“It’s a bit embarrassing to have been concerned with the human problem all of one’s life and find at the end that one has no more to offer by way of advice than, “Try to be a little kinder.””

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If it calls to you to become truly empowered in this challenging time, I invite you to become a part of my interactive online course What’s in Your Way is the Way starting on January 13th. We will explore how challenges in life are a roadmap back to true and lasting healing.

The course is currently $200 off with coupon code: $200WIYW5, thru November 15th. Every week you will receive written lessons along with audio and video files, so you can enter the course in whatever way that works for you. To learn more, click the link above. If you have any questions or are interested in our sliding scale please email Devrah.