Hallelujah!! Yahoo! Hurrah!

After years of sharing the message that to be joyously alive, you need to discover how to embrace the difficult parts of life – pain, sadness, loneliness, etc., this message is finally going mainstream.

I saw an interview with Susan Cain, the author of the phenomenal bestseller Quiet – The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking.  It has been on the New York bestseller list for eight years! They were interviewing her about her new book Bittersweet – How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole.

She said, “The idea of transforming pain into creativity, transcendence, and love is the heart of this book for embracing sadness can make us better people.” Her message is that bittersweetness is about the fact that in every lifetime and, in some ways every moment, there is a measure of joy and a measure of sorrow.  When we acknowledge that, becoming real in our communications, there is a richer form of happiness we can get to. Being real also helps us to realize how precious life is for it becomes clear that we live in a land of impermanence and every moment is a gift.

She goes on to say, “The problem is we’re not telling each other the truth of what it is like to be alive and who we actually are. When we tell each other the truth of what we are experiencing rather than the presentation of that smile that may or may not be authentic, that is when we connect.”

She then speaks the truth that acknowledging the sadness we all experience can make us better people for her research shows that people who have greater access to their sadness and longing also have easier access to wonder, awe, and creativity. It was also discovered that these people tend to be more forgiving, less angry, and more content.

My heart just soars when I hear her message. As Agnes Whistling Elk, Lynn Andrew’s teacher says, “Without your dark side your beauty would not exist. Honor all as a part of the great spirit.”

Of course, this ability to connect and transform pain into love comes from the ability to be real with yourself. You are by far the most important person to be real with and yet we deny, stuff, reject, and try to run away from the uncomfortable parts of being human. Everything I share in my books, blogs, radio shows, groups, and sessions is all about how to safely and easily embrace the parts of life that we have formerly resisted. When we are no longer afraid of them—for they have been brought home to our hearts—we then become whole and holy human beings, radiating the love and realness we all long for.

If you are interested, here is one of my most favorite chapters in all of my books, The Fertility of the Dark from Belonging to Life.  And here is a link to Bittersweet on Amazon.  Both of these are well worth reading.