The Gift of Our Compulsions


To some degree, we are all compulsive. Our struggles range from overworrying and overworking to overeating and alcohol and drug abuse. Our primary reaction has been to try to control our behavior, but when we try to control our compulsions, they control us. If we do manage to stop one, another always seems to take its place.

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When we try to control our compulsions, we think that this will hold back these powerful urges, but controlling never brings us the lasting healing that we long for. There is another way of working with compulsions that is about being curious rather than controlling and about responding rather than reacting. Our compulsions thrive in reaction. They heal in response. They won’t let go until they teach us how to engage with them, giving the attention and the compassion they need to heal. In the light of our compassionate attention, not only do our compulsions lose their power over us, but they also become a doorway into the healing that we long for.


Allow this book to be a companion and compassionate guide on your journey of awakening and to help you discover the perfection that is always already here, in the depth of the present moment, regardless of what is happening. — Eckhart Tolle

Ancient wisdom tells us that the best solution to a problem is sometimes to relax into it rather than to struggle and fight. This is the essential insight Mary O’Malley brings to the challenges of compulsive behaviors. As she explains, this involves the cultivation of compassion, forgiveness and curiosity. Our culture, besotted with the desire for control, deeply needs this message. –Larry Dossey, MD, author of Healing Words, Reinventing Medicine, and Healing Beyond the Body

Finally, a conscious, loving and insightful way to understand and deal with our compulsions. Mary O’Malley has penetrated tot he heart of healing behaviors that many of us find overwhelming. This book takes compulsion therapy to a whole new level. –Alan Cohen, author of Mr. Everit’s Secret

Client Testimonials:

I am doing a course and the Gift of our Compulsions is the book we have been working through. As someone who has been binging since the age of 10 (I am 70 now!) it was a revelation to read your book. Everything you say just resonates with me. For me it is the answer to the way out of my addiction. Thank you for all your love, wisdom and kindness; it is a process, but now I know how to approach my compulsions. ~W

I have been going through a difficult time in my life and came across your book on compulsions. I have rarely found anything so helpful.  The suggestions and teachings in the book are simply amazing- they lay out a path towards freedom and hope even when a person is living with pain and fear. I just want to thank you and say to you that if ever you need encouragement in what you are doing, know that you have given a stranger the feeling of being understood and the tools to access strength, greater calm and more happiness. I am sure you have helped hundreds of people and I know I am one.”  ~C

Additional information

Weight 1.5 lbs
Dimensions 11 × 8 × 1 in


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